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Author Topic: Romance Mathematics  (Read 1325 times)
Positivity
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Wishywishy6
« on: February 26, 2009, 07:36:51 PM »
stolen from ms. steph lai of san marino ^^

i remember reading this awhile back, but never got to sharing it. and now i found it again! some of you may have seen it already. enjoy -


***************************


ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.

A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
_____________________________

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."

They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
« Last Edit: February 28, 2009, 07:33:28 PM by admin » Report to moderator  
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kremlinmirrors
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WWW
« Reply #1 on: February 26, 2009, 09:06:08 PM »
Haha I love the last part!!
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jessikwa
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« Reply #2 on: February 26, 2009, 09:12:22 PM »
HAHAHAHA WOWWW
it's sad because most of it is true Sad
that's right guys, MOST, not all! Grin
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dajackstah
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« Reply #3 on: February 28, 2009, 02:20:47 AM »
wow these make so much sense...they should be taught in a course  Grin
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"That's what she said."

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mdwaid
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« Reply #4 on: February 28, 2009, 12:43:06 PM »
I like this--should totally be made into a sticky  Cheesy
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Classes Taken: Soc. 1, 5, 101A-B-C, 105, 150 (dropped); Math 1B, 53, 54, 113; UGBA 10, 101B, 102A, 103, 105; French 2, 3; Nutri Sci 10; Nuclear Eng. 39A; Econ. 1, 101A (dropped); English 166AC; Stats 134 (dropped)
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« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2009, 07:33:28 PM »
NERD WARNING LOL

This is awesome.
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Why so serious?
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Fear not the Wolpertinger...
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2009, 11:00:38 AM »
The very last bit about the aunts was great. The rest of it just made me dread having to find a spouse at some point in my life. TT
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Where now the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow.
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« Reply #7 on: March 31, 2009, 02:02:02 AM »
Quote from: TheWolpertinger on March 30, 2009, 11:00:38 AM
The very last bit about the aunts was great. The rest of it just made me dread having to find a spouse at some point in my life. TT

Or you can just live alone and die alone Cheesy
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